I'm back...

I have to admit I have been avoiding you all after our last negative result. I didn't want to think about it anymore, and didn't want to bring anyone else down... But we have been continuing behind the scenes, laying low and not getting our hopes up.. We had our egg retrieval during the week, which was a couple of days early due to hyper stimulation. My minds goes off thinking...ooooo that often means a positive!... STOP IT shut up stop thinking like that. This is me talking to myself..just take the information being passed to you and do not think yes it's good no its bad..just SHUT UP.. We did retrieve 24 eggs which is sounding more positive...STOP! We had organized two surrogates however last minutes complications meant a transfer to only one surrogate.. The lovely Dr. is going to let us know of our options...however another two week wait has begun LOVE IT So maybe this time...? STOP STOP STOP IT!

I'm old and techno challenged...

Bare with me, I'm old and still learning how to add photos to my blog whilst on my iPad! The photo of my fur kids in last post was supposed to have attached text, anyway maybe next time I'll get it together! "There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy (dogs) licking your face!" Heres my fur kids, always attentive.

photo.JPG

photo.JPG, a photo by Gcfami on Flickr.

Scraping it together...cycle 2

That's definitely the difference in this cycle compared to cycle one...cycle one was exciting and new. This could be the answer we thought, this could be the answer to us ending our current life of endless ivf cycles, endlessly waiting to complete our family...endlessly endlessly waiting waiting.... With the failure of cycle one, came that feeling... Here we go again. We are still on that endless infertility cycle. (I know I'm talking to the right crowd about this). This cycle, cycle 2, we are scraping it all together. The money, and our courage. Can we really go through the disappointment again? Well, I couldn't stand it, I had to start organizing another cycle. M has serious concerns, and is still not ready to go on, but I can't wait. We have been doing this for too long now to give up... So, brace yourself, and hang on cause here we go again.. Money transferred today, mid June our lovely donor starts on those emotion bending drugs (good luck I know how you are feeling!) for an end of June egg pick up. Strap yourselves in, cause we have/are. Wish us luck

Negative scan...

There you go, I didn't know they existed but now I know...negative scan. No sac was visible for surro 1 and pregnancy didn't get that far for surro 2 No frozen. Dragged poor m to India ...

Thud!!....

That was me coming down to earth. We got the email early this morning telling us that our second surrogate mums' hormone levels had dropped away to nothing, meaning she had a chemical pregnancy. All of the problems that most normal people wouldn't have a clue about started coming back to me from our ivf treatments. I.e. the problems with DH sperm. What if this pregnancy does not continue either, what if they are not healthy, we don't have any frozen embryos so oh god we have to start again, maybe it will never work, aaarrrggghh! I've started with the prays again (he knows me quite well)...please please please be ok. We have scans on the 29th so will hold my breath til then.

Regular mums to be don't get any of this...!

We got the good news early on Wednesday morning, so Wednesday night we had a little mini celebration....as attached! Now I know a lot of you may be saying..don't get too excited yet, cause you have a long road ahead of you, and we do know that...it's just on our journey to have a family, we have never even been on the road before! In fact after 12 ivf's and a few with the added drama of egg donors, we have never even had a positive blood test before! So that in itself for us is worth a celebration.

We are trying to bring it down to earth now, but it's really hard. I asked M when I was 'allowed' to start buying baby things today when I got home from doing the groceries this morning. When I was there, trawling down the shopping isles, I even allowed myself to go down the baby isle, the isle in the past few years I have refused to walk down. Look at all these things I will have to buy in the very near future!!! Bit pathetic eh?..anyway He replied, we have a long way to go (blah blah he is the more practiccal of the two of us) then said pull out the 'baby stash', with a big grin on his face...as you can see we are having trouble gaining control of ourselves...so I pulled down the shopping bag from the top of the cupboard, the few little bits and pieces of baby clothes etc that I have bought over the years, when I thought 'it has to be this time...' Oh gosh, we are saying looking at each other...are we really going to have a little human that's going to be so small as to fit into these gorgeous little things! We love him/her already...

Reading all the blogs over the last couple of months, I cannot believe how long some of you have kept it from everyone. I am absolutely bursting! Anyway,stop it! Get control, I am going to wear myself out if I keep this excitement level up for the next 8 months!

Aside from this, we are also waiting anxiously to hear how our second suurogate is going.  She had a low positive reading, so second blood test was, we hoped, scheduled for Thursday or Friday, but opening my email account 3am Thursday morning and 3 am Friday morning to no avail... we would have to wait until after the weekend to see if we had a second pregnancy.

For the family following, here is the schedule for the next 8 months;

FIRST TRIMESTER

Positive pregnancy result – 4 weeks

Once your surrogate mother tests positive for pregnancy she is moved to our surrogate housing. At this stage the gestational age of your pregnancy is four weeks, dated from the first day of the surrogate’s “presumed” last menstrual period. 

5 weeks

Scan to determine number of gestational sacs.

6 weeks

Scan to detect fetal pole (your growing embryo) and heartbeat.

8 weeks

Routine scan

10 weeks

Routine scan

12 weeks

Blood test – complete blood count (CBC) and urine test. Nuchal translucency scans (measurement of the fluid behind the baby’s neck). Sonologist looks for a nasal bone and measures Biparietal Diameter (BPD), across the top of the head at its widest point. Sonologist looks for gross congenital anomalies (GCA)

TRIMESTER TWO

Second trimester starts week 13. Please note in second and third trimesters scans are not always done on exactly the date you turn a particular week. If you wish to know you scan date please contact your client manager.

16 weeks

routine scan and triple marker test, complete blood count and urine analysis – triple test not done for twin pregnanciesas results are not accurate. Triple test results take up to two weeks to be sent to our clinic.

20-22 weeks

Level II scan, blood and urine tests. Baby is measured from crown to rump, around the middle and around the head. The four chambers of the heart will be viewed, as well as the kidneys, bladder, stomach, brain, spine, and sex organs (gender will not be revealed). A survey of the organs, including umbilical cord, ensures that they are developing normally.  Sonographer looks at amniotic fluid levels, location of the placenta, and fetal heart rate. Level 2 scan results can take up to a week to be returned to the office.

We do a 3D scan at this stage.

24-26 weeks

routine scan and blood count and urine analysis. Injection: tetanus toxoid first dose

TRIMESTER THREE

Third trimester starts week 28.

2-30 weeks

routine scan. Fasting and post prandial blood sugar tests, CBC, urine analysis. Injection: tetanus toxoid second dose

32-34 weeks

routine scan, blood test (CBC) urine analysis

36-38 weeks

Colour Doppler study, to check heart and flow in major blood vessels blood test CBC, urine analysis

38-40 weeks

delivery of baby

Anyways, I hope to have more news for you soon.  In the meantime here is a photo that pretty much sums up how we are feeling at the moment.  The dark cloud that we have had hanging over our heads is clearing, and it feels like the dawn of a new time for us (bit dramatic?).. :)